A church member sent me this list of bulletin bloopers that they found online. It's good to be able to laugh in the church, something that seems lost these days. I hope you enjoy these:
The church is glad to have with us today as our guest minister the Rev. Ralph Green, who has Mrs. Green with him. After the service we request that all remain in the sanctuary for the Hanging of the Greens.
Our youth basketball team is back in action on Wednesday at 8:00 p.m. in the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.
Let us join David and Lisa in the celebration of their wedding and bring their happiness to a conclusion.
The pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, “Break Forth with Joy.”
It’s Drug Awareness Week: Get involved in drugs before your children do.
The Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
Please welcome Pastor Don, a caring individual who loves hurting people.
This evening at 7:00 p.m. there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Jones to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.
“Wise Up, O Men of God”. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say “hell” to someone who doesn’t care much about you.
The Rev. Adams spoke briefly, much to the delight of his audience.
Don’t let worry kill you, let the Church help.
Ushers will eat latecomers.
Twenty-two members were present at the church meeting held at the home of Mrs. Marsha Crutchfield last evening. Mrs. Crutchfield and Mrs. Rankin sang a duet, "The Lord Knows Why."
The church will host an evening of fine dining, superb entertainment, and gracious hostility.
Miss Charlene Mason sang, “I Will Not Pass This Way Again,” giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It is a great chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don’t forget your husbands.
Wednesday the Ladies’ Liturgy Group will meet. Mrs. Johnson will sing, “Put Me in My Little Bed” accompanied by the Pastor.